Remembering Those Who Died, Supporting Those Who Remain
Each year on 29 September, National Police Remembrance Day gives us a moment to honour police officers who have died in the course of their duty. NSW Police also recognises officers who have died through illness or other circumstances. Behind every name are people who knew that officer as a partner, parent, friend or colleague.
For a family, remembrance may bring comfort in knowing their loved one has not been forgotten. It may also bring a fresh awareness of their absence. For colleagues, it can recall the person they worked beside, the circumstances of a death, and the knowledge that the risks of policing are real.
These experiences do not follow a single pattern. Some people welcome a ceremony and the company of others who understand. Others may find public remembrance difficult, even when they value its purpose. An officer might feel sadness, anger or guilt, or simply need some quiet after the event. None of those responses measures how much the person mattered.
A colleague’s death can be both a bereavement and a traumatic event. Research on loss in policing describes how officers encounter death through their work, including the deaths of fellow officers. The effects can extend beyond the immediate incident and deserve attention in their own right.
That distinction matters. Someone grieving a colleague may miss their humour, advice and everyday presence. If the death was sudden or distressing, they may also be troubled by memories of what happened, questions about what could have been done, or a heightened sense of danger. These responses can coexist. They should be understood in the context of the person’s relationship, experience and circumstances, rather than assumed from their job title.
For families, support is often most visible immediately after a death. Yet anniversaries, milestones and ordinary days can continue to matter long after a funeral. Staying in contact, remembering the person as they lived, and asking what kind of support is welcome are meaningful ways for a community to remain present. Research with surviving police spouses has examined the role of social connection after a duty-related death.
Remembrance also asks something of us beyond one day. We can honour those who died while making room for honest conversations with serving and former officers about grief, trauma and the pressures of police work. A colleague should be able to say that they are struggling without feeling that this diminishes their service or their respect for the person who died.
On National Police Remembrance Day, I remember the officers whose lives were lost and acknowledge their families, friends and colleagues. My thoughts are also with those for whom 29 September brings a particular name and a personal story to mind.
Dr Gill SH Walker is a clinical psychologist at INPSYGHT in Manly and Belrose. Her work includes therapy for occupational trauma, PTSD and grief. Book an appointment here.
References
- NSW Police Force. Police Remembrance Day.
- Line-of-duty death: Psychological treatment of traumatic bereavement in law enforcement.
- Inevitable Loss and Prolonged Grief in Police Work: An Unexplored Topic.
- The impact of cohesive groups in the trauma recovery context: Police spouse survivors and duty-related death